The Ten Commandments of Motherhood

Ten Commandments for Mothers

 

  1. Thou shalt not shower without an audience for the next 5 years (minimum)
  2. Thou also shalt not use the toilet in peace.
  3. Thou shalt only drink cold cups of tea
  4. Thou shalt not covet your old perky boobs but instead rejoice in your new, more practical, cows udders.
  5. Thou shalt not sleep. Ever. Again.
  6. Thou shalt not leave the house without your Mary Poppins handbag in tow.
  7. Thou shalt not take Mr Tumble’s name in vain
  8. Thou shalt use baby wipes to form the basis of all cleanliness for both your child, yourself and your home from this day forth.
  9. Thou shalt not commit murder when your husband arrives home from work and wakes thy sleeping child after thou has spent two hours rocking her to sleep
  10. Thou shalt not hide in the cupboard drinking wine so that thou children leave you alone

 

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10 Comments

    • April 29, 2016 / 10:24 pm

      Glad you enjoyed x

  1. April 29, 2016 / 4:53 pm

    Haha! Fab! Thou agree with all the commandments above! Especially, not committing murder one! lol!

    Thank you so much for linking up with us on #FabFridayPost 🙂 x

    • April 29, 2016 / 10:24 pm

      Thanks for reading x

  2. April 29, 2016 / 10:10 pm

    Oh thank goodness it’s not just me! I have three year old and I swear my handbag has got bigger the older he has got! And the babywipe thing?! That has been a guilty secret for so long – but no more!
    Great post 🙂 #FabFridayPost

    • April 29, 2016 / 10:24 pm

      I know! I feel like a pack horse I have to take so much stuff with me! x

    • April 30, 2016 / 1:44 pm

      Great, thanks for commenting x

  3. May 1, 2016 / 8:09 pm

    Loving number 4! And it’s so funny how they always want to come into the loo with you. It’s not just me either-Piglet will follow my mother in there too, and even tries to go into the loo with my brothers! Thanks for linking up with #FabFridayPost
    Single Mum Speaks recently posted…Five Pertinent Pieces of Advice From My MotherMy Profile

  4. May 2, 2016 / 10:58 am

    I remember when going to the toilet by yourself counted as living the dream! Thank goodness the Tubblet grew out of that one.

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