It’s Time For A Change

There’s been a little change in the air around these parts.

Up until my return to work a few months ago, I was dead set on pursuing blogging as my sole source of income. I read every post going from more established and what I perceived as ‘more successful’ bloggers. I could probably tell you every single piece of advice on what to do to make a blog a “success” at this point because I lived and breathed it.

But recently, I’ve had what I would describe as a little bit of a wobble. Maybe I’ve changed, maybe it’s because I have less time than I did. Well, I definitely have less time anyway.

I think it started when I started receiving emails and messages from other, newer bloggers. Sensible women, brilliant mothers who asked me for my “secrets of success” in this blogging business.

“How have you built your blog into such a success?” they all wanted to know.

I’ve dutifully passed on the many tips and all the advice that I have been given myself but the truth is it left me feeling a little bit weird. What feels like very recently, I pressed publish on my first blog post and I truthfully never thought anyone would read my blog, let alone recognise me at events or ask for my advice. I don’t feel qualified to give the advice. It just feels weird.

I’ve stopped to think about that recently. Why does it feel weird? I have achieved quite a bit with this blog after all.

So, I’ve taken some time out to think about things. What feels good to me? What feels right? What is it that I love about my blog. That I love about being a blogger?

change

And the truth is – it’s not about the stats. The number of people who read my blog? I couldn’t care less. It’s about connecting with other mothers, feeling less alone. I’ve found motherhood to be painfully lonely at times and the tribe of mothers that I’ve met through blogging and social media has been and continues to be a life line to me. Im interested in communicating with you, the person behind the page views. Not just the number that goes up or down on a daily basis on my stats counter.

Maybe I’m less interested in making my blog into my primary income source because my real job is in communications. I am a mother and I get to work for a phenomenal company. Those are both jobs, vocations and livelihoods enough for me. There is nothing wrong with blogging for a living and it is a fantastic, exciting and thoroughly exhausting and rewarding in equal measure.  I admire many bloggers and the influencing empires that they are building for themselves but I have had a real insight into what it takes to create this kind of empire and I’m just not sure I can do it that way.

If I have to obsess over page views, self-promotion and churn out posts because I’m paid to do so – for me I lose all creativity. I lose the ability to connect with you, to stand side by side in the trenches with you in this parenting lark. I lose myself and my perspective.

I am a writer. I need to write, I thrive on it and I love it. It’s less of a money maker and more of a necessity. I want to share the good, bad and ugly of being someone’s mother. I want to share when my head gets so full that I think it will pop off my shoulders. I want to write as it comes out, as I speak, as though I’m chatting to a friend. I want to connect and interact with each one of you as people – not as page views.

In this sense it really doesn’t matter whether  50 people or 500 people read my words on a daily basis so long as the ones who do read, leave feeling more like connected, reassured or just a bit less alone in this crazy business of parenting.

Yes, I do and I will continue to work with brands and often I am paid for my time in the same way you are with any job. However I will level with you and admit that I now turn down 90% of all work I am offered. I simply will not write a fake review in the hope that more work will be offered to me next time. I will not write about the latest ‘must-have’ app when I couldn’t care less about any of them and I will not peddle things to you that I don’t absolutely love or need myself.

If I don’t find it exciting, then I just won’t be giving it air time. Brand collaborations can be exciting for me of course but not as exciting as the buzz I feel when I recognise you and see that you have come back again to engage, take time out of your day and leave a comment on my post.

I know that many brands will only want to work with bloggers who have a certain number of page views a month. It doesn’t matter though. I cannot be anything but my largely outspoken self and if I can make a living doing it this way then that’s great. If I can’t then so be it. I will still be a mother, reaching out to other parents in the trenches and that’s enough.

For now, I’m happy running round after my kids, chasing my dreams in the corporate world and chatting to you on Instagram stories. As for blogging? Well, I’m going back to basics, to the reason that I started blogging in the first place – just to connect, reach out and to stand side by side with all the mothers juggling, struggling and laughing their way through the day to day of raising babies, toddlers and children.

So that’s it really. A bit of a change and a little bit of an update.

Until next time.

x

 

 

 

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20 Comments

  1. March 31, 2017 / 7:00 am

    Hey Fi, good on you for finding what’s right for you. I Totally get where you’re coming from. For me it’s not about the numbers and how many followers I have.

    It’s about the interaction I have with people – offline in real life as well as online. It’s also about how I can share a few tips here and there to help others with their blogging, business or career journeys (of just life’s ups and downs!).

    I don’t think it’s about working with every brand that contacts you – it’s about collaborating with ones that work for you. It’s also not about working with brands – I sense that some bloggers feel they have to when it’s not essential to have a lovely blog.

    I think it’s good to find out what’s important to you and follow it. We all have different blogging values and aspirations and that’s cool.
    Your honesty is what people love. Respect lady xx
    Sunita recently posted…How do we explain sad events like bereavement to our children? My Profile

  2. March 31, 2017 / 10:12 am

    I love this! So refreshing to hear someone say that working with brands isn’t the be all and end all. When you start out after a few months that’s what you think you have to do. Honestly I would just love for people to read and like what I write and comment without being forced to because of a linky. I’m not quite there yet but I did get a comment from someone the other day who I respect and has a great blog and she hadn’t come from a linky. It made me happy! Even if she was only one of 30 people to read it that day. Would love to chat/meet some time and hear more about your work as my background is comms too. I’m glad you’re finding your balance and what works for you. Love your blog xx
    Susie at This Is Me Now recently posted…#funseekingkids – a new Instagram communityMy Profile

  3. March 31, 2017 / 4:36 pm

    Oh Fi yes yes YES!! One of the things you said in here is actually the same as the reason why I’ve gone through a horrid case of lost blog mojo the last 6 weeks. The loss of creativity because of paid posts and stuff that just isn’t from the heart. I think ultimately we all make a decision at some point in our blogging journey as to which side of the fence we need to be on for our sanity/individual situation: out and out commercial and a fair bit of the blog’s soul missing OR just write for the love of it and the effect on people. Fab post love.
    absolutely prabulous recently posted…5 Things People Need to Stop Doing on Twitter!My Profile

  4. March 31, 2017 / 8:59 pm

    I love this post ❤️ I can relate in that I left a good, secure job in marketing last summer to take some time out with my baby and pursue some freelance work. I also had dreams of growing my blog and making money from it.

    Like you mention the pressure killed creativity and the lined blurred between work and home for me. I know there are lots of perks to working for yourself but I didn’t feel it was right for me. So now I’ve got a lower pressured part time job and I get to keep my hand in marketing, and any writing I do is purely for a hobby. If anything comes for it then it’s a bonus but like you I love bearing my soul and connecting and inspiring others.

    And not to mention the time that blogging takes oh my word! I find that between being a mum and working part time I barely have any time to myself so I’m not sure why we put so much pressure on ourselves to build this empire you mentioned.

    Good for you, your honesty is refreshing, keep inspiring xx

  5. March 31, 2017 / 9:24 pm

    You are certainly one of the bloggers I admire, because you always write something that I hadn’t realised I thought or cared about and then you write your Perspective and I think, yes that’s what I was thinking I just wouldn’t have thought to communicate it, or if I did it wouldn’t have been put across as well. I guess what I am saying is I am glad you are sticking at it he way you do it as I, as a fan of your page and blog, enjoy it! x

    • April 3, 2017 / 8:34 am

      Thank you, that is such a lovely, genuine thing to say 🙂 x

  6. Julia
    April 2, 2017 / 2:45 pm

    I love reading your blog posts

  7. April 2, 2017 / 7:09 pm

    This is exactly how I feel right now, I’ve drafted a similar post – although I’m pretty sure I turn down much less work as I’m offered much less! But I find myself drawn into discussions about stats and I find it such a turn off. I’d love it if loads of people read my posts, I’m not going to lie, but the endless self promotion isn’t what I enjoy. I seem to have a bit of a wobble once in a while and it’s hard to get over it!

    • April 3, 2017 / 8:34 am

      I guess bloggers go one of two ways eventually and it is equally fine whichever way you choose. I’m sure you will be offered lots more work to turn down soon hehe 😉 x

  8. April 3, 2017 / 12:12 am

    I loved this post Fi! If blogging is your main source of income and you want to earn, earn, earn, then I guess you might have to sacrifice content to achieve your financial targets, but I simply couldn’t do that either. When I stumble upon a blog that mentions starting weaning when I know their children are 4 years old and older, it makes me die inside a little. I’d rather read a blog that’s genuine and I know I can trust rather than an advert for this, that and the other. I do work with brands, but everything I do, I either do it because I love the stuff to start with, or because it will give my children a fun experience they wouldn’t have gone near otherwise. x

    • April 3, 2017 / 8:32 am

      I love your blog Mel, you have got the balance just right for me! Thanks for your lovely comments – I guess I thought I was going to earn my main income from blogging but it turns out that I just don’t want to compromise on how and what I write. Also I know what you mean about the weaning thing haha x

  9. April 3, 2017 / 7:11 am

    Hey lovely, lady. These are some of my favourite pictures of yours! I loved them on Instagram. I absolutely love your honest writing and your humour. Your natural flair for writing ‘pops’ off the page and I know what you mean about having to have honesty and integrity and write for writing’s sake and not for the stats or the brands. I can only write about something if it’s something I connect with too or that I can find an angle on that appeals to me.

    Hopefully with some income coming in you can continue to be free to have your blog as your happy, creative place. ‘Content is King’, not Brand Endorsements and your humour, honesty and heartfelt writing keeps me popping back!
    Jane Taylor recently posted…Be afraid! Top 12 terrors of childhood, according to 1970’s Public Information Films.My Profile

    • April 3, 2017 / 8:30 am

      Aw thanks Jane 🙂 That’s so nice of you to say! And I’m really glad you do keep coming back. Hope you and yours are doing well xx

      • April 3, 2017 / 8:57 pm

        Yep! We’re off in the caravan to Norfolk this week to catch up with friends so looking forward to family time ☺️

  10. April 3, 2017 / 8:14 am

    Good for you, this is a great post. I agree, one of my favourite things about blogging has been connecting with other mums, it can be an amazing support network! Love the photos in this post 🙂

    • April 3, 2017 / 8:33 am

      Ah thank you so much x

  11. April 3, 2017 / 11:44 am

    so much love for this honest post Fi 🙂 I’ve completey changed my blogging outlook over the past few weeks and really cut back on stressing over stats and collabs that i’m not even fussed on. I’ve been saying no! and it’s felt great. ive taken time out on an eve to actually relax and i’ve enjoyed switching off my phone. i’ve even signed myself up to a walking group (they do run as well but im not there yet haha). I’ve basically had a rethink! sounds like we are on similar pages xx
    Emma me and b make tea recently posted…Fitness, Failure and Living to 100My Profile

  12. April 5, 2017 / 6:35 am

    Great post. It kind of reflects how I’ve been thinking about blogging but in The sense that I crave more interaction. I haven’t found a ‘tribe’ and that’s something that makes me feel quite small and unnoticed. I don’t know why either, and, like you, I’ve read post after post about blogging, and how to be ‘better’ at it. Good for you for feeling that it’s not all about the stats, it’s nice knowing that other bloggers have the same feeling as I do when it comes to blogging. Thanks for sharing x

    • April 24, 2017 / 11:19 pm

      I think it can be hard to find a tribe as such until you go to some of the blogging events. Have you tried any of the blog conferences yet? x
      A Mum Track Mind recently posted…Butlin’s Minehead Part OneMy Profile

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