Pinterest Mums look away now.
I hate crafts. And playing. Especially the make believe kind. Hate it.
Having Zak at the age of eighteen, I’d kind of thought that my reticence towards PVA glue and glitter was more to do with the fact that I was still craving the university lifestyle of my peers. I was a shit crafter and that was, I’d told myself in part due to the selfish nature of a younger person. Or in other words, I couldn’t be bothered. I was also studying a full time midwifery degree and trying to keep him alive but these are just details.
Ten years on and Sophie made an appearance. In between bouts of hysteria and general pregnancy ailments, I’d told myself that this time it would be different. That I would be different. I was going to be the best god damn Pinterest mum the world had ever seen. And whats more, I was going to love it.
Homemade meals, organic everything, a craft basket to rival Mister Maker (which she would never have heard of as my daughter wasn’t going to be watching the television), all the sensory, signing, music and movement classes you could sign us up for, fresh air until the cows came home and endless one on one time where we played gender neutral games to broaden her mind. Maybe even a second language thrown in for good measure.
That was how it was going down this time. I was going for full on perfect Pinterest Mum of the year. Because that is what I really thought I wanted. That’s what I thought would be best for her.
Ahem. Yes, well…
Fast forward one year on and Sophie is engrossed in the Teletubbies as I type this. I have yet to even whisper the word “craft” in her direction and we went to approximately three baby massage classes before I gave up through sheer boredom.
Of course I do play with her and I actually enjoy reading with her but I am literally dreading the day when she mewls “Mummy will you play with me?” with her big baby blues on full guilt trip mode. Because in all honesty I will want to say “no.” And I will have to say yes.
I also hate crafting. Or ‘crapting’ as I’ve not-so-affectionately renamed it.
Just the thought of it makes my eyes glaze over and my fingers twitch for my Instagram or Pinterest feed. Because I do love to flick through them. Oh the irony.
Despite having had to admit to myself that I’m just not the crapting type, I still find myself having days (hormonal ones) where I really want to be the perfect Pinterest Mum. I have even taken to planning out a whole crafting organisational sideboard for the dining room such has been my Pinterest lust at times.
In fact, if you head over to my Pinterest feed, there is a good chance you will see actual crafting boards on there. I know – I feel like a fraud but I do genuinely want to be that person when the mood strikes. Thank God it doesn’t last long.
Give me a good strong coffee and a look at the outside world and the moment usually passes and I’m faced with the reality of who I really am. Or who I’m not.
I hate crafts, there will be no handmade Easter baskets or painted loo rolls in our house and there will probably always be slightly too much reliance on the television. It’s just the way I am and its about time I owned up to it.
Shit at crafts – great at cuddles. That’s me.
So how about you? Are you a Pinterest Parent?